the gay gene exsists. here's your proof:

circusgirl: Have you ever had the ratatouille provencale from Trader Joe's?

andalusian: I make my own. It's probably decent. Do you like ratatouille? It's good with a little chevre on top.

circusgirl: LOL – ok so I’d never heard of it and I bought it and I was microwaving it reading the ingredients to see what I’d bought and one of the cute gay men from Publicity walks by and goes, “Oh Ratatouille, I make my own” and I said, “What is it anyway” and he’s like, “You’ve never had Rattouille??”….do you guys all go to the same secret meetings?

andalusian: I think it's the gay gene.

circusgirl: Seriously. Then the girl I work with walks by and she’s like, “what’s that?” why don’t the straight people know?

comic strip about me via anne

boredom becomes me

god, i'm freaking bored. work is dead, market is struggling, i've been on every website on the internet. somebody give me some friggin' inspiration.

more triplegrandenowhipnonfat commentary

more starbucks talk, sorry. i don't really know what to make of the 300lb+ ladies, or men for that matter, who are ordering venti mochas or frappuccinos at 8:00am. i feel like i'd be doing them a disservice by not tapping them on the shoulder and saying, "hi. excuse me, i don't mean to interrupt your morning routine but did you know that drink has 650 calories in it? ...and well, let's not fool ourselves, you really should be watching what you eat. let's trade that in for a nice hot green tea, shall we?" isn't that what a good citizen should do? shouldn't we watch out for the well-being of our fellow consumers? in fact, one day i was putting non-fat milk into my grande mild roast when this heifer rolled up to the counter and hip-checked me out of the way like there was a stash of secret pies behind the napkin dispenser. "grrrrr there's no half and half", she grunted. i replied concernedly, "maybe someone's trying to tell you something", and left.

vive el rio

essie and i finally have our plane tickets and accommodations set for our trip to brazil in february. i am fucking pumped! can't wait to accost all the young, brown pool boys. grrrr.

shut up, just shut up, shut up

i start every phone call at work with "shut up. i hate you." and THEN i pick up the receiver. one day my hand is going to work faster than my mouth and i'm going to get into trouble.

gobbletta buys a house

...a gingerbread house, that is.

*calls bakery* "um, hi. do you make gingerbread houses? [pause] oh great! do they have edibility?"

will the real ann coulter please sit down?

ok, i'm definitely a tree-hugging democrat on most issues. i don't make the blanket assumption that all conservatives are evil/homophobic/racist/etc. i'm always up for a bi-partisan debate on economics, welfare, human rights, whatever. ann coulter, on the other hand, is a neo-conservative, ignorant bitch. she is one of the few that i will gladly hate on at any given moment. in fact, the students of UConn have done just that. she had to cut her guest speech at the university short due to incessant jeering yesterday. sweet. although not as sweet as the pie throwing incident at the university of arizona in 2004 (see photo, courtesy al-pieda).

make the yuletide GAY

god, i love christmas. Who's in for this year's santa speedo run? it's for a good cause...really.

ventiNOwhipNOfoamEXTRAhotNONfatCHAIlatte

*i hate people who order drinks like that.

**futures are down this morning but it looks like i'll make a little cash in TXN anyway due to their strong YE forcast.

***i started getting a venti cappuccino at SBUX instead of a grande non-fat latte. it only has 130 calories vs. 210 in the latte...AND the cappuccino has more caffeine. when was the last time you heard news that fantastic!?!

dreaming of pork products

*i've been trying to eat really well lately, but i miss my old diet which consisted of eating everything in sight. i had a dream last night that i lived in a castle made of bacon.
**our part-time receptionist lady is so classy. i always see her heating up her chef boyardee lunches in the break room. i wish i could pull off stirrup pants as well as she can! sigh.

large cap growth vs. sexual identity crisis

"Transamerican Investment Management, LLC, is a new identity for an established business--a full-service asset manager with a 35-year history of strong results."
-www.transamerica.com

not to be confused with...


Felicity Huffmans new identity as "A pre-operative male-to-female transsexual takes an unexpected journey when she learns that she fathered a son, now a teenage runaway hustling on the streets of New York". (IMDB)

who's got the funk?

*it smells like sloppy joes in here. gross.
**i have 2 zits on my face. i never get zits. yesterday my pants were short and i thought i was growing. i think i'm hitting puberty #2.
***the market is having a nice little rebound today after a selloff yesterday. i'm expecting a choppy couple of weeks with a nice finish to the month. i'm staying long large core companies due to speculative forecasts from the bulls and the bears for 2006. holding on to SBUX, ABT, TGT, WB, SPLS, and TXN.

saddam: thespian-at-large

i think mel brooks should write a musical revolving around the events of saddam heussein's trial. i mean, he's so theatrical, he's just a natural! i feel like these are stills from the producers. he should cast someone really hateable for his role...someone like charlie sheen.

makes you think...

relevant to so many aspects of life.

scotch flavored water

*i was hanging out with essie, steph, and jon on friday and after my 5th johnny walker i thought to myself, "i wish water tasted as good as scotch. there should be scotch flavored water. i'd drink it at the gym." is that weird?

**i think the pants i have on are shorter than usual. can your legs still grow at age 24? do you think anything else will keep growing?

***in other news, i love when reps call in because they keep screwing up their password to get into our site. all of the repcodes/passwords are case sensitive and in CAPS e.g. repcode: JSMITH password: A5SF2. people will call in to complain about their repcode not working. i'll ask if they used caps, they'll say yes and demand that i reset their password. i'll try logging in as them and it will work just fine but they insist something is wrong on their end. our websites will never lock you out and i don't have the authority to reassign passwords so i sit there and pretend i'm resetting their info. "just one moment sir...(clickitty click click)...let me... (click...browses sale items at bananarepublic.com...click)..just reset this here... (click...checks horoscope...click)...and you should be all...(click)...set. try it now". rep enters same repcode/password, "oh, it worked! wow, you've been such a great help!". "thanks sir, i aim to please". freaking morons. it's all about manipulating perception.

mama, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys

don't let them pick guitars and drive in old trucks//make 'em be doctors and lawyers and such//mamas don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys//they'll never stay home and they're always alone//even with someone they love -willie nelson

i was in a movie theatre the other day and a preview for brokeback mountain came on. it started subtly then there was a shot of heath and jake cuddling and almost everyone in the audience started giggling. i laughed too, i suppose it was the peer pressure.

why are man on man relationships still so funny to everyone? i suppose it makes people a little uncomfortable when they're "forced" to see two men involved in public displays of affection. i mean, i would expect reactions like that from an alabama movie theatre or something, but i was in downtown boston where us homos are getting married left and right. why can't the general public find legitimacy in gay male relationships?

are we (gay men) the modern day black minstrel? our exposure in the mainstream media consists of: queer eye/will & grace/any sitcom with a gay character who is never in a remotely serious relationship let alone holding *gasp* another man's hand on-screen. don't get me wrong, i think it's great that ang lee produced this film and that it's getting such wide distribution, but it bothers me that a room full of (presumed) young liberals'/boston college students' gut reaction would be one of laughter. perhaps the audience would've taken it more seriously had it been cast with actual gay actors.

whatever. i'm still going to see it, if only to see heath and jake make out on the big screen. if anyone laughs at me when i marry my boyfriend, i'm going to kick their ass.

Happy World AIDS Day!

"When God gives you AIDS, and God does give you AIDS, make lemon-AIDS." -sarah silverman

"boys, boys, all types of boys"

"black, white, puerto rican, chinese boys." -missy

they're everywhere today! i almost got trampled at starbucks. yum.

so, um, yeah, like, what?

"i've been leaving words out of my emails lately and they don't make any sense. i guess i have some kind of learning disablement." -gobletta